A Good Cat Slapping

I’ve written some good stories over the years about our cat, Gabriel, Gabe for short. Gabe Spanks a Spider and The Shrinking Box Game to name a few. I thought I would set down and write another one, this time about how much he enjoyed being around humans.

Kate, our other cat, never liked being around any of our guests or family. But Gabe, now he loved it. He was a quick learner and could engage himself into anything he wanted. Start up a game of ping pong and he would hop up on the table and lay in the net. His contribution to the game simply meant he would paw anything out of the air that was within paw reach. He was a good jumper too.

It wasn’t long after we bought a bar for our newly remodeled den. It was actually one half of an air balloon basket, L-Shaped. Gabe was intrigued by it. It tended to gather adults. It was too high to risk a jump when he couldn’t see what he was landing into. So, he had to learn how to engage the bar seats. This proved difficult. The backless bar stools spun as they rose and lowered the seats. Early attempts threw him left and right, hooking and slicing into the wrong fairway. No, he had to hit it dead center, only then would the stool not spin. He learned this fast. Now he could gain access to the bar counter and all the adults that were there. He learned how to wiggle his way around cocktails, pretzel baskets and ashtrays. Yeah, we smoked back then.

I even taught him how to drink a martini glass of water while sitting in a bowl at the end of the bar. People found him interesting and he knew it. Gabe played this game often. Sometimes when I was just doing things around the house I would find him on the bar looking for a martini. We got into a habit of spending more time there. I would keep him hydrated and he would make me laugh. We even learned another trick. When I would pass by him sitting on the bar, he would raise his paw out and I would high five him. He would high four me.

This became an obsession with him. He began high fouring Carrie. We just kind of got used to it. Walk by the bar, high five the cat.

One day the neighborhood friends started organizing a beach/boating vacation in the Florida Keys. It sounded wonderful and we agreed to join everyone. Only problem is we would need a cat sitter. I was speaking with a dear friend of mine at work and he offered to sit at the house.

“Mike, I can do it.”

“Cliff, I appreciate the offer, but I don’t want you to go to all that trouble.” I said.

“It’s no trouble and I like cats.”

“Well, if you are okay with it, we would love you to do it.” And it was settled. Cliff would cat sit many times over the next few years. It was comforting to know a friend was watching your fur babies and your home.

So Cliff moved into our home for a week while we hauled luggage out to the car for the ride to the airport. A full week of sunshine and boat fun came and went too fast. We were back on the plane and heading back to frigid Chicago. When we returned home we found Cliff in the living room with our cat, Kate.

“How were the cats this week?” Carrie asked.

“I really love Kate. She is a real sweetheart.”

“How about Gabe?” I asked.

“So that one scares me a bit.” I was surprised to hear Cliff say this.

“Why would you be afraid of Gabe?”

“Well, every time I walk past the bar he slaps me in the butt.”

Bad cat. Bad cat.

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