A Lunch Date

Lunch is about to start at a restaurant in an old village somewhere in Mexico.

Act One, Scene two. Two friends meet for lunch to catch up. Friend numero-uno is known as Fred, friend number two is Ethel. They arrive at the restaurant at precisely the same time and walk in together. The table is set, drinks are ordered and conversation begins…

“How are you Ethel?”

“Me, well I’m doing well, Fred. Otis, my cat is sick but I think she’s on the mend.”

“Why did you name her Otis if she is a female cat?”

“Otis is a gender-neutral name isn’t it?”

“I have never met a woman named Otis.” says Fred.

The waiter returns with drinks. A Bloody Mary on one side and iced tea on the other. “You see the thing with it is that this restaurant isn’t that good.” Fred says to Ethel.

“Oh, is that a Mexican point of view or a Gringos?” queries Ethel.

“Well, first of all, the chips and salsa aren’t that good.”

“Oh, I have always been delighted with them.” Ethel says as the chips and salsa arrive.

Fred digs in devouring the chips & salsa and as the conversation continues Fred speaks up. He is spitting bits of chips onto the center of the table. Ethel moves her drink closer to her card-holding side of the table.

“And look at this menu! They offer all kinds of gringo food, but it all comes out Mexican style Why can’t I get an American plate?”

“Well what do you want? I think the menu offers many options.”

“I would like to order something that reminds me of home!”

“Stop raising your voice. People are looking at us!” Ethel glares at Fred and then turns to her left where she sees me. I am two tables over and losing interest in my phone and finding more in their conversation.

“I don’t care. I have had enough. I don’t understand why getting what you ordered is so difficult!” Fred says.

Ethel responds, “Look, these people, these proud people have suffered their whole life trying to make ends meet and even worse, most of them don’t know what they were robbed of five centuries ago when the Spanish arrived. And if that wasn’t enough, the contemporary locals are in no hurry to change anything. You should put yourself in their shoes!”

Ahhh, rubbish!“ Fred protests, “All I want is a good lunch. How hard is that?”

“Patience is the key” Ethel tries to accommodate but the pre-lunch discussion begins to wane. After checking both phones, both diners return to their conversation.

“Maybe we should go down and walk along the lakeside after lunch?” Ethel suggests trying to lift his spirits.

“I don’t know. Let’s see how I feel after our amazing lunch,” sarcastically pitched by Fred.

“You are always so negative. You are living in paradise! Smile for Christ’s sake!” Ethel protests.

“I know, I know, but can they just make me a square meal?”

Ethel averts her eyes because she is too embarrassed with her lunch partner and needs to collect herself. She turns back to me where I suddenly find something very fascinating on my phone again. She attempts to change the subject with Fred.

“Are you interested in the concert at Lake Chapala Society this Friday night? They have such great shows.”

“No Way!” Fred blurts out. “I am tired of people acting like someone else and getting paid for it”

“But Fred, they are entertainers. Everyone that has ever gone into the entertainment business has started by imitating their heroes. They say that that is the greatest form of flattery”

“Rubbish!”

Lunch arrives. They have decided to split a plate. One Chicago-style hot dog with fries. Fred is a real–big-spender. The meal is over and it is time to pay the check. Fred insists on a five-percent tip. Ethel is mortified.

“Fred,” she says calmly, choosing her words. “I have always supported you and your late wife, my best friend, but you need to know… that if you cannot get your head screwed on right and look around at what you have before you, then you will lose something else besides good American cuisine. You will lose me.” The moment hung in the air with not even one mariachi band playing.

Fred thought about it for a while and finally said, “You are right. Let’s go walk along the lake. I need my friends. I need you.” They stood and walked to the lake. Fred held Ethel’s hand as he noticed the parakeets flying above his head. The Jacaranda trees were now in full lavender bloom. Mexican children were playing in the park volleying playful screams and laughter to one another and up into the wistful air. Fred had never noticed these things before. For the first time in his long life he finally began to understand what it meant to be in the moment. Carpe diem at last.

Don’t be Fred.

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